The Patching Friars' AlmanacA calendar of CVE saints

← Chronotaxis of the Popes

BlueKeepHoly card for papa-2019, generated with AI (Claude, Anthropic) for the Lunario dei Frati Patchatori.CC BY-NC-SA 4.0 RDP 3389 BlueKeep TURRIS CAERULEA
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Pope of 2019

Pope BlueKeep I

Encyclical

"Turris Caerulea". A Remote Desktop bug, exploitable without credentials and able to spread on its own, pushed Microsoft to patch even Windows XP and Server 2003, long out of support. Everyone expected a new WannaCry; what came, in November, was cryptomining. Lesson: the alarm works best precisely when the disaster never arrives, and RDP does not belong on the internet.

Saint page: Saint BlueKeep, Who Could Have Become a Worm

Cardinals

Saint Shitrix, the Name Says It All

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Saints:Google CalendarApple, Outlook and others (.ics)

Observances (feasts, scourges and miracles):Google CalendarApple, Outlook and others (.ics)

In Google Calendar you can also paste the URL in Settings → Add calendar → From URL. The first sync can take a few hours.